Whatever comes to mind, whenever

I’ve been trying to sleep on the flight from Fort Lauderdale to Dallas but failing miserably. So I’ve given up and hope that maybe journaling might lull me to sleep!

I realized that I forgot to mention what happened immediately after church yesterday (it seems so far away now!). We got to play with the boys one last time before saying goodbye. Mackenlay and Berry (the youngest boys at the Boys’ Home) got some new clothes and looked so adorable in them. When Mackenlay came to the home, he was malnourished and small, but now he is walking around normally and is at a healthy weight (still skinny, but a healthy skinny). Berry is much heavier than Mackenlay, even though they are the same age. His eyes break everyone’s heart though; his are eyes that have seen far too much pain for one so young.

A lady was talking with Mackenlay, and he gave her a kiss, and everyone began asking “Is that Mackenlay’s mom?” Later on, Jen told us that it was his mom. Now, this is the reason why my trip to Haiti was so heart-breaking: Mackenlay’s mother knew she couldn’t provide for him, so she gave him to the Boys’ Home because she knew he would have a much better life there. I couldn’t imagine how hard that decision must have been to make: to give up your only child because you know you cannot support them. The saddest part is that so many mothers are put in that very same situation all over the world, but they don’t have a place like the Boys’ Home to send their children.

After saying good bye to the boys, which was still difficult even though we had only spend a few hours with all of them, we rode back on the Tap-Tap to the house. On the way, I did a lot of thinking. I thought about how happy the Haitians I had met were, and how happy the boys, who had had such difficult lives, were around us. And then I thought about how bitter and angry and depressed Americans in general are. I also contemplated the faith of those I had met, compared to the faith of fellow Americans, and I was addend by the contrast. We in America are so “blessed” by our nation’s prosperity. We have health insurance, hospitals, doctors, free public schools, and countless other things. In comparison, Haitians have little or nothing. But who is the more blessed? Because of our reliance and trust in worldly things (let’s face it, we’re spoiled!), we don’t rely on  God nearly as much as we should. Jean-Alix said “You know, in AMerica you have hospitals and things like that, but here in Haiti we have none of that. When someone’s child stops breathing in the middle of the night, they don’t call an ambulance, they call me and I pray for them. Because of that we in Haiti have stronger faith and trust in God.”

And I know he’s right, because I don’t rely and trust in God as much as they do.

Why is it that so many American Christians suffer from addictions to pornography and alcohol and other things such as depression and doubt? It’s probably because they’ve never actually had to trust God with their lives, literally. Christians in third world countries are living day-to-day trusting God with their lives, and because they have no other choice. But, imagine the relationship that these Christians have with Him! They constantly live in communion with their creator. Sometimes I think it

would be better to live a life such as this, because of how much closer to God I could grow. But I know God has me in this situation and life for a reason, and I also consider it a challenge or a test God has set before me. He wants me to grow in my faith and reliance on Him, even though my situation doesn’t “require” me to.

One of the group members, Clay, said of this topic in the last team meeting: “It’s almost as if the hardest mission field in the world is America, because people don’t think they need to rely on God or trust Him. I’m going to school to study theology so I can convince people to follow God.” In Haiti, they don’t need convincing. They know that following God is the only way to live in this life.

As I was thinking about these things in the Tap-Tap, a song popped into my head: “You’re the God of this City,” and it brought tears o my eyes thinking about the lyrics. And, now that I understood the threshold Satan has in Haiti through Voodoo, the lyrics mean so much more:

You’re the God of this City

You’re the King of these People

You’re the Lord of this nation.

You are

You’re the light in this darkness

You’re the hope to the hopeless

You’re the rest to the restless

You are

For greater things have yet to come and greater things are still to be done in this city.

Incredible! GOD is the God and the King and the Lord of Haiti and it’s people, not Satan! Greater things have yet to come for Haiti! Just thinking about that brings tears to my eyes, and reminds me of the one year anniversary of the earthquake. We were told that the churches all over Haiti, including Jean-Alix’s in Guibert and elsewhere (he pastors about 10 in all), are planning on holding a huge revival. I am so eager to see how God uses such a tragedy to bring more people to His family!

As uneventful as flying is, it gives you a lot of time to ink (or to sleep, in some cases!). It also gives you a lot of time to consider things with God and have communion with Him.

Maybe hovering about 2,000 feet above the earth gives clarity. At least, I hope it does.